I swore I’d never expend energies
trying to change
this mammoth institutional church.

Some may have been called
to do this,
but surely not me.
Let others try.

I vowed to spend my time and effort
Helping the Bereaved
One on one, or in small support groups,
or in workshops or retreats.

I believed that I could help
keep the Tree that is church
healthy at the grass roots,
regardless of which red bird
is perched atop.

Yet why do I get so angry
at the un-Christlike activities of this
Institution?
Why do I spend so much energy
Writing letters to the Editors
And anybody else who will listen?

Why do I get so excited about
Organizations like Call to Action and
Voice of the Faithful?

Are all the people
who bow when they’re told, evil?
who pray as they’re told, evil ?
who don’t discuss what they’re told not to discuss,
evil?
Who never grow beyond conventional wisdom,
Evil?

Of course not.

But, I get angry, not because they’re evil,
But because they’re missing so much.
And that so many of the hierarchy
want to keep them exactly so
angers me terribly.
Dear Holy Spirit, with Your help,
I go along and keep trying to help people
at the grass roots,
but aren’t You just as angry
that this Institution has strayed so?

Dear Holy Spirit,
Please not me,
But Thee,

Unless, of course . . .